Santorum: Dan Savage May Have Started It, But The Media Is Laying It On Pretty Thick

The latest one is just trying to top the others:

Santorum comes from behind in Alabama three-way (poll)

It’s really kind of refreshing to see the media use the language creatively (rather than just mangling it nowadays) to use an inside joke to describe a presidential contender. It often goes unnoticed in middle America, but if you’re looking for it, it’s everywhere. Kind of like the CSI black light treatment only for language. It’s disgusting, but it’s hilarious.

From Gawker:

Every Funny Headline Involving the Word ‘Santorum’

Santorum, as followers of politics know, is the Bible-thumping Republican underdog who tied Mitt Romney at last night’s Iowa Caucus. Santorum is also, as users of Googleand followers of Dan Savage know, aneologism for ”the frothy mixture of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the by-product of anal sex.”

Here are headlines about the former that are much funnier when you imagine they are about the latter.

• Santorum Breaks Out in Iowa
• Santorum Runs Hard on Long Final Day
• Neck and Neck: Romney Tops Santorum
• Romney Tops Iowa, Santorum Surges
• Santorum Links Black People, Public Aid Programs
• SANTORUM STUNNER
• Will Santorum Surge Travel?
• Romney Pips Santorum
• Poll Shows Santorum Trails Romney, Obama in Pa.
• Santorum Surges With Low-Dollar Model (prostitute pegging story)
• Why Santorum’s Surge Could Be Sustained (guide to longer-lasting orgasms)
• Why Evangelicals Coalesced Around Santorum
• SANTORUM SURPRISE
• After Santorum’s Rise, a Test (of butt strength)
• In Final Lap Santorum Comes From Behind (Catholic news source!)
• Huntsman Heartened by Santorum’s Rise
• Santorum Bubbling Up Everywhere
• Romney and Santorum Split the Spoils
• Santorum Tests Chocolate Truffle Milk at Christmas Party
• The Fallacy in Santorum (better if you skip second half of headline)
• Santorum Surges, Paul Pushes, Perry Prays, Gingrich Cries (accurate depiction of each candidate’s sex life)
Romney Ekes Past Santorum
• Romney Turns Attention to Santorum
• Gingrich: I’d Team Up with Santorum
• Santorum Pushes Supporters to Keep Surge Alive

I have removed the word “Rick” from a few of these, to enhance the humor. If only he went by “Dick.” And his middle initial was “N.”

The best thing about the Santorum surge is that, even in Romney’s best case scenario, he must still confront a “Romney Pushes Out Santorum” headline. Poor Mitt. If he wants Santorum out, he’ll have to loosen up.

Don’t Do It. Fight The Urge!

Ahhh, ya weakling. =) It does really sound like that, huh?

Santorum: Separation Of Church And State ‘Makes Me Want To Throw Up’

I’m starting to really enjoy watching political batting practice with Rick Santorum these days. No matter what pitch they think he’ll lay off on, Rick just keeps swinging for the fences. So if you were expecting him to try to give a good safe political answer on the separation of church and state question on Sunday, you watched him drive another soft pitch deep into the the Christian rights’ bleachers.

“I don’t believe in an America where the separation of church and state are absolute,” he told ‘This Week‘ host George Stephanopoulos. “The idea that the church can have no influence or no involvement in the operation of the state is absolutely antithetical to the objectives and vision of our country…to say that people of faith have no role in the public square? You bet that makes me want to throw up.”

The GOP candidate was responding to comments he made last October. He had said that he “almost threw up” after reading JFK’s 1960 speech in which he declared his commitment to the separation of church and state.

Santorum also on Sunday told Meet The Press host David Gregory that separation of church and state was “not the founders’ vision.”

via Santorum: Separation Of Church And State ‘Makes Me Want To Throw Up’.

Well, gee, Rick, you know what makes me want to throw up?

Chris Christie’s Gay Marriage Veto: We’re Going to Override It

Now this IS good news. Now, who can use this to their best political advantage: ignorant haters or the folks who deserve their rights?

Governor of New Jersey at a town hall in Hills...

Image via Wikipedia

New Jersey nearly made it to the finish line. Unfortunately, a governor driven by national ambition derailed the fight for equality and fairness. But Governor Christie’s veto only delayed the day and time when we finally establish marriage equality in the Garden State — because it is going to happen in New Jersey, and we are going to override his veto.

Two weeks ago, the New Jersey State Senate and Assembly passed legislation that would establish true equality in the way we treat same-sex couples. It would officially recognize same-sex couple unions for what they are: marriages. Along the way, we encountered the usual hysteria that pops up anytime this issue is mentioned. We heard the same old claims, all of which are based either on fear, hatred, or simple misunderstanding. We heard the ridiculous statements about this opening up a Pandora’s Box that would allow people to marry their dogs. We heard all the inane observations from those who in no way, shape, or form would have been impacted by this legislation.

In the end, my colleagues proudly stood up and rejected those arguments. They stood with those whose only request is to be treated like everyone else. It was an enormous accomplishment, particularly in the Senate, where just two years ago a similar bill failed by a vote of 14 in favor vs. 20 against (it required 21 votes in favor to pass). At the time, I abstained from voting, unfortunately — a decision I immediately regretted.

In two years’ time, however, I and many of my fellow colleagues came around to see this issue for what it was: a matter of equality, fairness, and justice. In the end, the Senate passed marriage equality by a 24-16 vote, with two courageous Republicans defying their governor and voting for what was right. The enormous shift between this latest vote and the one we took two years ago clearly spells out that the days of treating same-sex couples as second-class citizens in New Jersey are numbered.

Unfortunately, Governor Chris Christie refuses to be part of the solution to this problem of inequality. Driven by national ambition that would rather see him be president (or vice president) than do what is right, the governor first tried to deflect his position on the issue by calling for a public vote on whether or not same-sex couples should be allowed to marry.

Anyone who is a student of history knows that you never, ever put the rights of the minority up for a vote of the majority; the majority will almost always vote it down. Not only was Governor Christie clearly ignorant of history on this issue, but his newfound sense of populism (the governor never seems to ask for a public referendum on any other issue) was also a way to relieve his Republican colleagues in the Legislature of their duty to serve the people. Our job as legislators is to act. If we are going to simply punt on every difficult issue that comes up, we might as well pack our bags and head home.

Luckily, the majority of legislators were able to see the governor’s action for what it was, and we passed marriage equality. Unfortunately, the governor last week vetoed the bill. As if the veto weren’t bad enough, the governor also called for an ombudsman to oversee the state’s current civil unions law. It was shocking. Governor Christie was actually advocating for a taxpayer-paid position whose main function would be to continue our state’s failed policy of discrimination. The governor would have been better off simply vetoing the bill — his new conditions are frankly an embarrassment.

The governor’s actions are disheartening, but they certainly do not represent the will and determination of the people of New Jersey. We want to join the ever-growing number of states that recognize that two people who love one another and want to be in a committed relationship should have the same rights as everyone else, regardless of gender. We don’t want New Jersey, which has led the way on so many other progressive issues, to be stuck in neutral while a country like South Africa, which only a generation ago had state-sanctioned racial discrimination, has already moved ahead on this issue.

I know many of my Republican colleagues believe marriage equality is the right thing. Unfortunately, Governor Christie has put political pressure on them to keep them from voting how they wish. I know we can change their mind. I know they are good people who want to do the right thing. And I know that in the end what is right and fair will ultimately win out. Though the governor has placed his feet firmly on the wrong side of history, he simply cannot stop the tide of fairness and equality that is rising not just in New Jersey but across the country. We are going to get this done.

via Stephen M. Sweeney: Chris Christie’s Gay Marriage Veto: We’re Going to Override It.

They love that

Can we be feminist and still have a sense of humor? I think so. Try not to laugh. Discuss.

The Tea Party In Reality

Apparently, it IS natural, Mr. Santorum: Over 1,500 Animal Species Practice Homosexuality

Rick Santorum has been widely quoted as saying that homosexuality is “against nature”. In fact, he has said that any sex act that doesn’t involve procreation is against nature. Once again, science begs to differ:

Homosexuality is quite common in the animal kingdom, especially among herding animals. Many animals solve conflicts by practicing same gender sex.

The Norwegian Natural History Museum of the University of Oslo is hosting the first exhibition that focuses on homosexuality in the animal kingdom.

“One fundamental premise in social debates has been that homosexuality is unnatural. This premise is wrong. Homosexuality is both common and highly essential in the lives of a number of species,” explains Petter Boeckman, who is the academic advisor for the “Against Nature‘s Order?” exhibition.

The most well-known homosexual animal is the dwarf chimpanzee, one of humanity’s closes relatives. The entire species is bisexual. Sex plays an conspicuous role in all their activities and takes the focus away from violence, which is the most typical method of solving conflicts among primates and many other animals.

“Sex among dwarf chimpanzees is in fact the business of the whole family, and the cute little ones often lend a helping hand when they engage in oral sex with each other.”

Lions are also homosexual. Male lions often band together with their brothers to lead the pride. To ensure loyalty, they strengthen the bonds by often having sex with each other.

Homosexuality is also quite common among dolphins and killer whales. The pairing of males and females is fleeting, while between males, a pair can stay together for years. Homosexual sex between different species is not unusual either. Meetings between different dolphin species can be quite violent, but the tension is often broken by a “sex orgy”.

Homosexuality is a social phenomenon and is most widespread among animals with a complex herd life.

Among the apes it is the females that create the continuity within the group. The social network is maintained not only by sharing food and the child rearing, but also by having sex. Among many of the female apes the sex organs swell up. So they rub their abdomens against each other,” explains Petter Bockman and points out that animals have sex because they have the desire to, just like we humans.

Homosexual behaviour has been observed in 1,500 animal species.

“We’re talking about everything from mammals to crabs and worms. The actual number is of course much higher. Among some animals homosexual behaviour is rare, some having sex with the same gender only a part of their life, while other animals, such as the dwarf chimpanzee, homosexuality is practiced throughout their lives.”

Animals that live a completely homosexual life can also be found. This occurs especially among birds that will pair with one partner for life, which is the case with geese and ducks. Four to five percent of the couples are homosexual. Single females will lay eggs in a homosexual pair’s nest. It has been observced that the homosexual couple are often better at raising the young than heterosexual couples.

When you see a colony of black-headed gulls, you can be sure that almost every tenth pair is lesbian. The females have no problems with being impregnated, although, according to Petter Boeckman they cannot be defined as bisexual.

“If a female has sex with a male one time, but thousands of times with another female, is she bisexual or homosexual? This is the same way to have children is not unknown among homosexual people.”

via 1,500 animal species practice homosexuality.

Well, There’s Your Problem

The Personhood Laws: The Defining Issue Of The 2012 Election

With the anti-abortion movements’ help, everyone else in the country may get a chance to weaken the Christian right’s power for a long, long time.

Oklahoma is about to be the first state where the “personhood amendment” is going to pass, setting the stage for the law to go to the Supreme Court. The right is counting on a Roberts Supreme Court, along with a 5 person Conservative majority, to usher in the overturning of Roe V. Wade. But before that happens, America will get to decide whether we’re going to be governed by the Christian Bible or basic human rights.

This is the leading edge of a slippery slope back to the 1950′s America for which old white men and Rick Santorum are nostalgic. The Oklahoma personhood bill declares life begins at conception and provides embryos and fetuses with “all the rights, privileges, and immunities” of other citizens. Anything anyone does to interfere with that – causing the death of the “person” – would constitute murder. And there are a myriad of other legal ramifications:

The Senate approved the bill which some say is an attempt to outlaw or restrict abortion rights but it also has unintended consequences, according to the mother of 5-year-old Gavin Gayanich.

“We did several years of fertility treatment to get him. I feel like I won the lottery every day. I wake up every morning and this is what I have because of in vitro fertilization and this bill will prevent us from getting another child,” Julie Gayanich said.

Representative Mike Reynolds said Oklahomans are looking for clarity on this issue.

“You couldn’t change the language to say that life begins at conception except in the case of rape. That doesn’t make any sense,” Reynolds said.

via Personhood Amendment Passes In Oklahoma Senate – News9.com – Oklahoma City, OK 

There are two bills in Oklahoma: the one that passed the Senate on a vote of 34-8, and the one that the House has not yet passed. The House bill, in addition to doing everything the Senate bill does, bans birth control choices like Plan B and fertility procedures such as in vitro fertilization that may result in the destruction of fertilized eggs (think of Octomom choosing not to have all 8 fertilized embryos transferred to her uterus). Additionally, it allows NO exception in cases of rape or incest. In Oklahoma, if your father, uncle or brother rapes you, or you are a coed at Oral Roberts University who is the victim of a date rape, the House bill requires that you bear the fruit of that attack for nine months until it is born. That means through morning sickness, prenatal check-ups, the first visible baby bump and the inquiries of friends and neighbors and family members . . . I am so sorry.

And it’s not just Oklahoma. Personhood bills are currently working their way through the legislatures of Iowa, North Dakota, Montana, and Texas.

It’s not about being pro-life. There can be an honest disagreement about defining the moment or event when life begins. These bills are not restricted to defining personhood as beginning at conception instead of at birth. It’s about women’s rights to govern the sanctity of your own bodies – basic human rights. This may be the most hypocritical issue of the Right: one of the main tenets of the GOP is keeping government out of our lives. Yet when it comes to reproductive rights they want to be right in the bedroom. (Now would be a good time to read The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood.)

If this were about preventing abortion, Rick Santorum, California Rep. Darrell Issa, all the Republican presidential candidates and the nine clerics – all men, one for each month of pregnancy – who testified about how against their principles it is to require them to provide contraception – these people would be the foremost advocates of contraception and sex education, because those two things prevent pregnancy. But they oppose contraception and sex education. These men (and, oddly, some women) are not content to forbid abortion: they also will forbid the best ways for sexually active women to prevent abortion: contraception and sex education. If you do have sex – even if it is against your will – they want you to take your chances and bear the consequences. What?? The hell??

As an aside, there is another common way for sexually active people to avoid unwanted pregnancy and consequent abortions: gay sex. I don’t think I have to explain the right’s position on gay sex. But someone should remind the presidential candidates and clerics that sex between men, and sex between women, is entirely abortion-free (assisted reproductive technologies excepted).

I think we can count on the right not to be able to paint themselves out of this corner. Rick Santorum is currently leading in the polls, and that’s a good thing. Using the Christian Bible to govern our country may resonate with the GOP base, but it’s very likely to turn off everyone else. Even Mitt Romney the Waffle King can’t afford to lose the Christian vote. If GOP leaders come to their senses, they’ll tell the personhood movement to pipe down but be assured that the GOP will take care of them. How many pro-lifers (especially women, who are overwhelmingly saddled with the responsibility of birth control) will think going back to the rhythm method is a great idea? In the privacy of the voting booth, even Mississipi, the state with the highest percentage of Protestant Christians, at 81% (plus 6% Catholics) according to a recent Gallup poll, resoundingly rejected the personhood law. (Mississippi also has the nation’s lowest percentage of Atheists and Agnostics at 5.8%.)

It will take a fight, and if progressives and women’s rights supporters can get the word out, we can finally have the basic human rights argument that this country needs to have: the Christian Bible or the Constitution. With which will the political center of the country stand?

If we let the GOP hang themselves, I’m betting – and hoping – this is the issue they’ll do it with. And that just may break the Christian right’s stranglehold on our country for a long time to come.

Let us pray.

By Jack Jamison and John McAndrew, uncommontary.com.

Santorum: The Only Candidate In American History To Have A Policy Position On Anal Sex

www.spreadingsantorum.com

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